South Lanarkshire Leisure and Culture

The Tartan Army- 28 years later.

Written by Ian Morland.

Directed by Isobel Barrett.

Goaaaaal! And Scotland are off to the World Cup!

The Passion…The Play-offs. The Penalties. The Pints!

Join us in this celebration of our lads smashing their way into the World Cup 2026 as we march alongside our own “Tartan Army” fanatics - Oor Troops Davie, Tam ,Shug and Rab.

They take you through the highs and the lows, life’s kicks and love’s blows as they follow the team from 28 years yesterday to 28 years now…alongside their “Tartan Barmy” long suffering, embittered wives.

A rollercoaster of tears, laughter and rousing songs to steal your BraveHearts!

“Full of cracking one liners!” Citizens Theatre

“A passionate romp through Scottish Football from start to finish” The Herald

A TRAM Direct Theatre Company performance, produced by Arts Enigma Productions -the team that brought you the smash hit “The Provy Wummin”

Available to book online or by calling The Town House Hamilton on 01698 452299.

Cost: £25.00 / save 10% group 10+ (subject to £1.50 transaction fee)

 

A night of pure laughs and banter starring Jane McCarry and Edward Reid!

Think Loose Women with a pinch of chaos and madness thrown in!!!

Join our panel – ‘Still Games’ Jane McCarry, ‘Britain’s Got Talent’s’ Edward Reid and radio presenter Ali Wright plus a special guest panellist for this uplifting powerhouse of a show and ultimate night oot!

A great catch up with pals, no subject is off limits, chilled vibes with wine and song, what could possibly go wrong?

Conflicting opinions, life stories and belly laughs – this show includes everything and does nothing by halves.

Prepare to be entertained, buckle up and strap yourself in, for this rollercoaster ride of a show that’s goes nicely with a gin!

So if you like a night oot and a blether about this and that - then get your tickets now for ‘Whits yer Chat’.

Available to book online or by calling Rutherglen Town Hall on 0141 613 5700.

Cost: £25.00 (subject to £1.50 transaction fee)

 

The #1 Live Experience for Families is heading to Lanark with it's BIGGEST tour to date as Megaslam presents: 2026 Live and Loaded Tour!

The 2026 Tour will feature all of your favourite Megaslam stars and some brand new ones!

Established in 2009 and presenting hundreds of live events per year, Megaslam truly is the ultimate live experience for families.

Team Nasty will battle it out with Team Megaslam in a series of action packed matches designed to get the whole family out of their seats and cheering on their favourites!

Get ready to enter the world of Megaslam - take your seat and join thousands of families each year as you witness The #1 Live Experience for Families!

Available to book online or by calling Lanark Memorial Hall on 01555 673199.

Cost: Ringside £20.00 / General seating £15.00 adult, £12.00 child (subject to £1.50 transaction fee)

Isosceles presents Songs of All Sorts.

Some of these songs are serious, some amusing, some old ones, some newer ones, some from different eras, some that you can sing along with, some you will know, some you won't know, some that you can tap your feet to, some that might bring a tear to your eye, some that you will smile at when you remember that you had forgotten all about them.

This brand new show has already had very enthusiastic reaction from audiences in Scotland and England.

The whole point about this show is that it is unpredictable - you really don't know what is going to happen next. The excitement is all in the diversity of the song selection.

Featuring songs by:

Ray Charles, Randy Newman, Fats Domino, Fats Waller, Tom Lehrer, Elvis Presley, Van Morrison, Eric Bogle, Monty Python, Chris De Burgh, Cliff Richard, Ketty Lester, Eagles, Thunderclap Newman, Frank Sinatra, Furey Brothers, Beatles, Andy Stewart, Clancy Brother, Buddy Holly, Norman Greenbaum, Morecambe & Wise, Christy Moore, The Dubliners, Everly Brothers, Val Doonican, Charles Penrose, Jim McCann, Pogues, and many more...

What the critics say about us;

‘An exceptional gift,’ THE SCOTSMAN.

'Almost brilliant.’ IRISH TIMES.

‘I felt the entirely enthusiastic audience could happily have stayed for more.’ MAIL ON SUNDAY.

‘Convincing and powerful,’ THE TIMES.

‘Expert performers.’ THE STAGE.

What Audiences say;

‘This was such an original show with so many beautiful songs.’

‘Gosh, these guys really can play and sing. If you get the chance, make sure you see this show.’

‘Such a magical evening – two performers at the top of their game. ‘

‘Pat and Dave are so talented. The songs were perfectly chosen. I was entranced from start to finish with their lovely singing and Dave’s fabulous playing.’

‘Lovely intimate and relaxed atmosphere, and a great selection of songs.’

Pat Abernethy and Dave Marsden (who are Isosceles) have been bringing shows to East Kilbride for about 20 years – shows like On Our Way to Lisbon, Songs from Ireland, The Man who left the Titanic, Your Favourite Comedy Songs, Jekyll and Hyde, Dracula the Panto, The Haunters, and the rest.

Available to book online or by calling East Kilbride Arts Centre on 01355 261000.

Cost: £16.00 / £14.00 (subject to £1.50 transaction fee)

 

Direct from London's West End!

A night of laughter, cabaret, mystery, and glamour!

Roll up, roll up. . . the UK’s longest running burlesque show is back touring the nation. And it’s bigger than ever.

The ultimate variety show blends stylish cabaret, comedy, music, circus and burlesque featuring world-class entertainers and stars of the stage and screen in an extravaganza of glitz and glamour! Expect fun, feathers and fabulous costumes as we pick from the finest selection of specialty artistes, cabaret and circus stars, comedians and champagne showgirls.

Burlesque has enraptured audiences for centuries. This sensational variety show brings together a bounty of beautiful stars for an unrivalled variety show for the 21st Century! Expect the unexpected with plenty of glitter and glamour! It’s cocktails and cabaret o’clock!

An Evening of Burlesque - we are waiting for you! Tickets on sale now!

Available to book online or by calling Lanark Memorial Hall on 01555 673199.

Cost: £32.00 (subject to £1.50 transaction fee)